Not built for the 9-5: Why some of us will never fit in...and that's OK

More than 50% of people do NOT suit traditional office life and what you can do if (like me) you're one of those people

Hi there, I’m Selina, a Career and Life Design Coach, author and podcaster. I’ve been helping people design lives and careers they love for almost two decades.

When I’m not writing here on Substack, I’m coaching clients all over the world, from my little green office in South East London. If you’re curious about what my coaching programmes could do for you, you can come and check them out over here

Not built for the 9-5: Why some of us will never fit in...and that's OK

The moment I stepped into my first full-time, 9-5 office job, I knew it wasn’t for me.

I felt like a caged animal - trapped, restless, and desperate for an escape. All I could think about was how much I didn’t want to be there.

My parents and peers reassured me that this was normal.

“No one really likes their work,” they told me. “You’ll get used to it.”

But I didn’t want to get used to it.

I didn’t want to spend the next 40 years of my life wishing the hours away and only living for the weekend.

I wanted to enjoy my work. I wanted to do things that felt fun and creative. I wanted work that made me feel alive and free.

Eyes rolled again.

“You need to stop being such a dreamer. This is life”

But I wasn’t willing to settle for a life that didn’t fit me. I knew there had to be another way.

So I quit my office job and set off in search of a world where people were doing things they loved for a living and working in ways that had them feeling alive and free.

And despite the doubts, warnings, and eye-rolls of the people around me, I did find that world.

I discovered that work doesn’t have to feel like a cage. It can be a source of energy, creativity, and joy. And now, for over twenty years, I’ve enjoyed creating a career that I love - one that fuels me, excites me, and gives me the freedom to work in a way that feels right for me.

Some people are wired for the 9-5 office life… and some of us just aren’t

What I didn’t realise back then - but I know now - is that I wasn’t alone in feeling that the 9-5 office life, with a boss telling me what to do, wasn’t for me.

The truth is, while some people do thrive in structured, routine-driven environments, many of us simply do not.

It’s nothing to do with how you’re raised, how you’re educated or how hard you try to fit in. It’s all down to your personality. And there’s nothing you can do to change it.

Either you’re wired for structure and routine. Or you’re not.

And according to Jungian Personality Psychology, around 55-60% of people are not.

I love Jungian Personality Psychology and have used it in my coaching for the past 15 years. It’s based on Carl Jung’s theory on personality and is the foundation for the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) - one of the most well-known personality frameworks today.

The theory is that we each fall into one of 16 personality types, and each type has its own unique mix of strengths, challenges, and needs.

Some personality types thrive in structured, hierarchical environments, while others need freedom, flexibility, and creativity to do their best work.

And here’s the game-changing bit:

Only four out of the sixteen personality types - known as the Guardians (SJ types in MBTI) - are naturally suited to traditional office work. These are the types who thrive in predictable, structured settings.

The rest of us?

We’re wired differently. And trying to force ourselves into a system that wasn’t designed for us will only lead to frustration, burnout, and self-doubt.

Discovering my personality type set me free

I am so grateful that I came across Jungian Personality Types as early on as I did.

I discovered I’m an ENFP - a personality type that thrives on creativity, freedom, variety, purpose and big-picture thinking. We’re great at connecting with people, spotting opportunities, generating fresh ideas and bringing energy, creativity, and big-picture vision to any project or conversation.

But put us in a rigid, structured environment and we’ll feel like we’re suffocating. Repetitive routine tasks drain us, attention to detail is not our strong suit, and hierarchical structures make us want to run a mile.

So of course an office-based 9 to 5 existence was going to make me feel like a caged animal desperate to escape - that environment that was never designed for people like me. Even if you throw in some bean bags and a pool table.

The system wasn’t built for us - but that doesn’t mean we can’t thrive

Here’s the thing: we need all personality types.

We need the Guardians - the SJs who thrive in structure, who keep systems running, who bring order and stability. I LOVE Guardians - they are the safest pair of hands and amazing to have on a team or on an adventure. They get a genuine kick out of making sure everything is running smoothly and nothing is forgotten.

But as much as we need those organised lovers of process and structure, we also need the creatives, innovators, visionaries, action-takers, crisis-navigators and divergent thinkers - known as the Idealists, Artisans and Rationals. These are the ones who question the system, push boundaries, and build new ways of doing things.

The problem? The Guardians have been in charge of designing how we work, how we’re educated, and what ‘success’ is supposed to look like.

So if you don’t fit their mould, you’re left thinking that you’re the problem.

You’re not.

If the traditional work model doesn’t work for you, it’s not because there’s something wrong with you. It’s because you were never meant to fit into that system in the first place.

Finding another way of working that does work for you

If you’re one of the many people who don’t suit the world of traditional work, then let me reassure you that there is another way. I’ve been helping people create ways of working that really work for them, for almost two decades. And I have a LOT to share!

✍️ Find out your Jungian Personality Type

First of all, come and find out what personality type you are! You can try this free one here (bare in mind a proper in depth assessment will be far more accurate - so if the personality type you come out with doesn’t sound like you, then trust your judgement and assume the test got it wrong!).

And then come and tell me what your personality type is!

🎙️ Listen to my podcast episode:

What to do when the traditional world of work doesn't work for you

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📺 Watch my free Career Change video series:

Career Change Series

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🎧 Listen to my Audible series (free for UK Audible members)

The Career Change Coach

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💫 1:1 Coaching

And if you want support in making a career that actually works for you? That’s exactly what I do. My 1:1 coaching is designed for people who don’t fit the traditional mould - who want to build a career that energises, inspires, and nourishes them.

➡️ Find out more about my coaching here

Ultimately work shouldn’t feel like a cage. It should suck the life out of you. It should nourish you and have you playing to your strengths in a way that you truly enjoy. So, if the traditional ways of working don’t do that for you, then I’m here to reassure you that there is another way and you deserve to find a way that works for you.

x Selina

P.S. I’d love to hear if this post resonated with you and if you feel relieved to know that you’re not the only one that doesn’t suit the 9to5 office life